leap year blues.

I'm upset right now. There's now sugar coating it. I just found out that there is know hope for me to get to paralympic trails. none they finally put something up that completely made this impossible. So I've been crying most of the evening. and I've now settled into the grim acceptance. I don't know what I'm going to do. I need something to work for and now this is gone. I just don't know.... there's now doubt in my mind I'll keep swimming but I'm frustrated. So incredibly mad, and upset. I wanted this more than anything in the world and I was working my butt off for it. How can you just keep putting up road blocks against people that had already been slammed into the ground Oh lets think....6 time in one year! ARGH! *angry tears*